Friday, February 03, 2006

Get your own back....on Telemarketers!!

This is so fantastic. It’s directly related to my current (soon to be former) employer’s activities and I urge you all to adopt this practice.

From the Irish Indo :

IRATE victims of cold callers are turning the tables by asking them a
tirade of questions about their personal hygiene.
Instead of letting the credit card salesman or telephone rep do all the talking, they are asking questions and keeping them on the line.
By quizzing them about things such as "Is it important to have good teeth in your job?" consumers are distracting them from selling their product.
Regulations introduced last year by the telecoms regulator, ComReg, means customers can register their preference not to receive calls from companies without their prior permission. Companies who breach these rules can face fines of up to €3,000 per call, but many Irish people are unaware of the service.
Call centre staff often have a prepared speech or script that they must stick to - but now so do victims, thanks to a Dutch conceptual artist.
Martijn Engelbregt's guide has become an internet phenomenon, with thousands of irate people copying it from a website to use when the nuisance cold callers come on the line.
It offers a set of questions to ask the salespeople and put them off their sales pitch - and cut their firms' profits by taking up their time. The counterscript begins by asking the cold callers to spell their name and continues with questions about their life and work. It eventually leads to talk of dental hygiene and ends
with the question: "Which toothpaste would you recommend?" If the cold
caller is still on the line after all that, the householder is advised to end
the call by asking: "Would you mind giving me your phone number in case I need
more information?" The idea came to Mr Engelbregt when a chat with one
salesman "got very personal and the guy told me he didn't like his job.
"I talked to him for more than an hour, asking him questions," he said. He said
the reaction to his guide has been huge, and he has been hearing from both
delighted consumers and irate salesmen. "I have had salespeople saying I am
stealing their jobs and threatening to call me 10 times a day in revenge," he
said. Cold calling has mushroomed in recent years thanks to advances in
technology and the use of cheap Asian call centres.
However, more than 80,000 Irish telecom customers have signed up for the service to make sure they don't receive unsolicited calls. To opt out, consumers must call their telephone provider and leave a recorded message of their preference to ban firms from contacting them.

To download Mr Englebregt’s counterscript, go here.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

The Great Escape

I know that posting has been light of late, but I have been a little preoccupied with things like, eh, building a house on my own and by myself. Well there are architects and builders involved – but you get my gist.

Oh and then there was the whole landing a new job thing.

I am so out of here. My new job is lined up – signed, sealed and start date agreed. And it’s not in some outsourcing group either. No siree!

I have handed in my notice and now play the waiting game, which is proving to be a very weird experience. Much weirder than the last time I left a company.
The head of our channel is giving me the silent treatment - a very mature response indeed. I actually have no work to do and there is absolutely no point in my being here today. I mean none. At all. I am writing this as I wait to meet for my exit interview. I can’t wait. I will be reasoned and honest and try at least to avoid breaking into a wildly celebratory dance as I scream “fuck you all” at the top of my lungs. I hope I succeed as I don’t think it would portray a favourably professional image were I to do so.

I think that I ended up in this kip for a reason though. I hope that the horrendous experience I have had being a yellow packer will help me to appreciate my new role (if I don’t fail miserably at it – nerves are getting me).

I am going to endeavour not to whinge quite so much about work in this new place. Unless it is terrible - then there’ll be whinging aplenty!

On the house front - I am having a hard time choosing between knobs.
How interior design can reflect every day life!